Most of what I’ve written so far has been about using the changes that the times are forcing on us to re-evaluate how we live life. I still stand by that. Today, though, I would like to temper that by making a case that any shred of normal you can keep during all of this will do you some good.
Every January, people make ambitious New Year’s resolutions. Some of them create lasting change, but many don’t. What makes the difference, I think, is whether the person realistically considered the issue I affectionately refer to as “change fatigue.” Change fatigue is when your willpower crumbles because you tried to change too much at once. All of a sudden, your noble goals for fitness, devotional life, or reading or whatever, go down the drain because you tried to do too much too fast and you find yourself with even worse habits than the ones you started with. In these tough times, so much change is being forced on all of us at once that all of us are experiencing a degree of change fatigue. To counterbalance this, you need shreds of normal. For example, I have a silly custom of using every St. Patrick’s Day as an excuse to eat Lucky Charms. They remind me of my grandma, who has beautiful red hair and would always get some for me every time I would visit her house when I was little. I considered skipping it this year because of the lines at the grocery store, but even though I had to wait in line to get it, I found the presence of that brightly-colored box of children’s cereal in my home last week incredibly comforting. Anything that helps you retain a sense of normal that doesn’t break the social distancing rules, for my money, is worth doing at this point. You need all of your change-coping skills just to get past the weirdness of this season. Anything comforting and familiar will help give you the strength and willpower to make wise decisions as you go about your life. I’m glad I have cats at home, because for them, nothing has changed except how much I’m home—and they don’t care. The simple rituals of feeding them, wrestling with them when they try to steal food, and casually scratching them behind the ears when they sit near me have a wonderful way of reminding me that some stuff doesn’t change no matter how weird the world is getting. Doing these things feels normal, and normal is very comforting right now. Whatever helps you feel normal right now, do it. Free up the energy to cope with everything else. It will look different for everyone, but find something that works for you. Even if it’s something that seems otherwise pointless, like putting on business attire to work from home, don’t let anyone judge you for it if it helps you. One woman in my social media network was mourning the lack of opportunity to wear her heels these days; if wearing heels around the house is comforting to you, it’s worth doing. Just don’t throw your back out.
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AuthorJillian Lutes is the youth pastor at West Covina Hills Seventh-day Adventist Church. Archives
May 2020
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